When is Drinking a Problem In a Relationship

It’s important to remember that alcohol use disorder is a medical condition, not a moral failing. The good news is, once you acknowledge that your drinking has become unhealthy, you can take steps to repair and heal from the role alcohol played in a relationship. Over time, unhealthy alcohol use can develop into alcohol use disorder (AUD), a medical condition characterized by drinking more than you want to for longer than you want to.

If you’re concerned about your partner’s drinking, there are many resources that can help you take a meaningful step towards change. That could include learning more about how to help someone stop drinking and starting an honest, compassionate conversation with your partner. Remember that you also deserve support, whether through support groups or engaging in therapy yourself. Finances are often one of the biggest stressors in a relationship, and if you add alcohol into the mix, finances can become even more volatile. This can happen for a variety of reasons, including overspending at the bar or grocery store, spending money on hangover cures and cab fares, and making irresponsible financial decisions when under the influence.

Signs alcohol may be affecting your relationship

FROM
SCREENING AND ASSESSMENT TO DECISIONS AND ACTION
Figure 2 summarizes the process of screening and problem assessment that we
have described thus far. The next step in the process is to choose an intervention
strategy that matches the nature of the identified problem. Alcohol can change the way that people interact with each other, sometimes in negative ways. If you’ve reached the point where it’s hard to communicate with your partner, consider reaching out to a therapist who specializes in couples and family counseling for help getting back on track.

Because of the all-consuming nature of substance use disorders, these consequences can have a tremendous effect on personal relationships by damaging social health. Personal relationships, especially those closest to you such as relationships with family members can be put under enormous strain when someone is struggling with substance abuse. When family members are
involved in treatment without the drinker, a careful assessment is required
to determine whether the affected family members are dealing with a loved
one who has a drinking problem. This initial assessment should be followed
up with confirmatory feedback. Providing further assessment of family coping
strategies and offering guidance in specific responses form the core of such
interventions. Safety issues and other aspects
of self-care must also be addressed, regardless of the drinker’s behavior
(See Assuring Family Safety).

Overcoming Alcohol Addiction at Renaissance Recovery

CHOICE
After discussing reactions of the drinker and family members to the feedback,
the conversation should move to determining possible next steps. Here, it
is important to ensure that the drinker has choices and does not feel forced
to select one option. Any movement toward change should be considered a positive
outcome of the brief intervention. Although total abstinence from alcohol
is always a safe, desirable outcome, reductions in drinking can lead to improved
health and social functioning.

They
may become angry with you for expressing empathy about how difficult it is
to face and change a drinking problem, or for trying to help the client make
decisions about how, when, and how much to change. You must walk a careful
line, not sacrificing the needs or desires of any family member to those of
others in the family. A balanced, empathic, and respectful response to the
reactions of each family member can neutralize some of the intense emotions
that surround this topic. This blog is for informational purposes only and should not be a substitute for medical advice.

Alcohol Use Impedes Intimacy

If you’ve begun hiding how much and how frequently you drink from your partner, drinking has become a significant aspect of your relationship. If you feel the need to be dishonest about your drinking, you may want to ask yourself why. Strong relationships are built on honesty and trust — secrecy is a red flag. You’re more likely to successfully abstain from alcohol if you have support. “Tell as many of your friends and family members who feel safe as you can about this,” Dr. Murphy said.

This damages your relationships for a number of reasons, largely because people don’t like being second to substance use. For example, drinking alcohol relaxes you at first because alcohol enhances the effect of the inhibitory neurotransmitter gamma-aminobutyric acid (GABA) and diminishes the effect of the excitatory neurotransmitter glutamate. Your brain quickly adapts to this change, producing less GABA and more glutamate. CHANGE
THROUGH REFERRAL
A second long-term strategy is to refer clients to community-based services
for help with their drinking problems. Alcohol treatment services are provided
at different levels of care — inpatient, residential rehabilitative,
intensive outpatient, outpatient, or self-help. Family
Requests for Change
Family members also can be guided to make specific, positive requests for
change from the drinker.

Seeking Professional Help for Alcohol Addiction

Alcohol can impair sleep, cause weight gain, exacerbate anxiety, or subtly change your personality. A study conducted by the RAND Corporation in September suggests Americans are drinking 14 percent more often in response to pandemic-related stress, especially women, whose heavy drinking days increased by 41 percent in 2020. Fortunately, there are more ways than ever to get support if alcohol is harming your life and happiness. Ria Health is one online program offering comprehensive help—from coaching meetings to anti-craving prescriptions—100 percent from your smartphone. With Ria, you won’t have to rearrange your life to start improving your drinking habits, relationships, and overall well-being.

For their loved one, it can feel as if all they are hearing is excuse after excuse, for being late, for disappearing, for the mood swings, for the missing money, and more. Trust is essential to a healthy and functioning relationship, and once it is damaged, it can be challenging to repair. Those suffering from alcohol use disorder face the same impulses and urges as drug addiction. Dependency on alcohol can cause a person to make decisions that negatively impact their life as well as those around them. They may also begin to lose interest in activities and people they typically enjoy when sober.

If you think alcohol may be affecting your relationships, it might be a good idea to consider speaking with a healthcare or mental health professional. They can help determine whether what you’re experiencing is alcohol use disorder and recommend further evaluation or treatment if necessary. The connection between alcohol, interpersonal violence and codependency is widely documented.

• It is often the fighting itself that can create an environment or situation in which the partner with the drinking or drug problems uses these substances to reduce his or her stress.
• There are numerous treatment options available to meet your needs, but many people begin with a medical detox program to help them manage alcohol withdrawal symptoms, which can be serious.
• Knowledge about
  such limits might have an important influence on the drinker’s decision-making.

Normal personality traits can disappear during intoxication and be replaced with selfish, angry, and egotistical behavior. Contact our team today to learn more about all the different levels of care and how to get your best relationships back on track. Furthermore, drugs and alcohol may lower inhibitions encouraging someone to be more willing to engage in risky behavior such as sharing drug paraphernalia or engaging in unprotected sex. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, binge drinking results in $249 billion a year in healthcare-related costs and lower employee productivity. The National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence notes several ways drinking and drug use affect family members. Prior to conducting the BDP interview, you
should familiarize yourself with the definition and equivalencies for a standard
drink.

People who struggle with alcohol addiction may also push people away to protect them from witnessing their self-destruction. They may feel guilty for their behaviors and want to avoid hurting others. The chemical shifts in the brain can lead individuals to stop nurturing their relationships. If few things elicit joy besides using alcohol, drinking may become a preferred activity over socializing or connecting with others. Furthermore, someone with an alcohol addiction may actively hide things from the people they love.

“Detoxification literally means removing the toxin,” said George F. Koob, director of the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism. This can be done on your own unless you have moderate to severe A.U.D., in which case you should seek medical help. If you’ve decided alcohol is having a negative impact on your life, try distancing yourself from it for a while. Remove bottles from your physical spaces and booze-related content from your virtual ones. Cleanse your phone and computer of anything that might tempt you to drink.

It hijacks the reward pathways, reinforcing the behavior that created such an enjoyable reaction. Even if the secrets and lies aren’t malicious or manipulative, they damage alcohol and relationships the connections and trust that have been established within a relationship. It can be hard to believe someone who acts erratically or bends the truth too often.

Roll
With Resistance
Drinkers often attempt to persuade others that their drinking is not problematic. If you avoid arguments,
empathically accept that the drinker is ambivalent, and encourage the drinker
to merely consider an alternative viewpoint, resistance is likely to decrease. Express
Empathy
Empathy implies an acceptance https://ecosoberhouse.com/article/how-to-taper-off-alcohol/ of each family member’s experience, perspectives,
and emotions, and requires the ability to express this acceptance in a warm,
compassionate manner. Appendix A features
copies of exemplary instruments for both screening and problem assessment,
creating a complete “Clinical Toolbox” for you to use in your practice.